


All Wrong

by bioticgoddess



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Jason Todd/Red Hood - Fandom
Genre: Funeral, Gen, Grief/Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-03-31 22:19:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13984503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bioticgoddess/pseuds/bioticgoddess
Summary: What you/the reader (one of Batman's padawans) are thinking and how you're processing the loss of Jason after the Joker killed him (Death in the Family).





	All Wrong

**All Wrong**

You stood before the head stone, his name -  _Jason Peter Todd_  - carved in it, staring back at you. Your eyes, which had once been bright stars were empty. Their light replaced with storms that burned your cheeks, made your make up run, and caused everything to turn angry, red, and raw. Your face was ached from so many tears.0 From wiping them away. From the salt that stained your skin. You had rubbed your eyes til they were swollen.

What lay before you was wrong: a wooden casket, a stone slab upright with his name and dates scrawled on them, and everyone clad in formal black. The box was closed, only your mentor - his father - had seen the body since that morning. 

You had, however, been there was he was found. Images you would never get out of your mind. Burned like photo negatives into your memory.

The image of how he’d been - battered, broken, bloody - clashed with the youth you remembered - bright, vibrant, warm. His Robin uniform torn and caked in blood. One eye swollen shut and more bruises and open wounds on him than even his father had ever seen. No pulse. Not breathing.

You hadn’t heard your own scream. Or felt your legs go out from under you. Didn’t remember Batman putting you in the Batwing and sending it back to the cave. Nor Alfred leading helping you back to your room, the one across the hall from what had been his. He had needed time and couldn’t tend his son and you. But you remembered waking up, in a worse state than this day, in Jason’s bed. Your face buried in his pillows and a photo of the pair of you staring out at where he should have been.

You didn’t tell the others thy you wished you had died with him. You were young and had a long life ahead of you , some had said. Friends and family who cared about you. You were drowning. There was an anchor tied to each of your limbs and you could barely breathe. 

The sounds of winches and pulleys lowering the casket into the grave brought you to the present. if it hadn’t been for Barbara’s hand, wrapped around your own, you might have collapsed or fallen in with him. 

You felt broke. Empty. Like the world had been destroyed and you were falling - face first - into a black hole. Not the sun, no instant death but the long slow decay of gravity’s pull. All you wanted was to squeeze your eyes closed, open them, and see Jason standing there - laughing. An arm around you when he teased one of the others. 

When you did close your eyes, the same scene greeted you a moment later. No one had been able to save him. No one could bring him back. The knowledge that he was gone,  sat in your stomach like a stone. And the chasm in your heart grew wider and the hole in your being deeper. Nothing would ever be right again. Not with him gone. 


End file.
